A Radiant Sunday
My friend parallel parked at a park with no name in his white, 2004 Mustang. It was Sunday, it was sunny, and we had ordered authentic Honduran food nearby. Cute girls in sundresses passed by, and we felt like kings at a picnic, sprawled out on the grass, soaking in sunlight.
"I'm sorry I called you a pussy last night," he said.
"And I'm sorry I was so hard on you," I replied. We both smiled as we chowed into our baleadas.
We'd had a bit too much to drink the night before and had been a bit too honest with each other. But there's nothing worse than a friendship without honesty. I've had too many of those—the ones where I have to walk on eggshells with every word I say, hoping not to trigger an alarm.
But as with everything, even honesty, moderation is key. I tend to go big or go home and see honesty as some absolute necessity. Lots of movies reflect on this and help question the assumption that honesty is always good. I don't remember the context of one movie but I do remember a conversation:
"I just wanted to be honest," a character said.
"No, you just wanted to get something off your chest and feel better; and now you've made a bad situation much worse," the other replied.
I'm starting to see everything in life as a balancing act. I guess Aristotle was right when he called virtue, "the means between extremes". Nothing in life is absolute, and all we can do is try to accept that. Like Andy Samberg's character, Nyles, says in Palm Springs, "We kind of have no choice but to live. So I think your best bet is just learning how to suffer existence."
We can't help being who we are. Some of us have bad tempers, others tend to assume the worst; still others are depressed or anxious. As the annoying Christians like to say, "Everyone has a cross to bear." And they're right.
As I sipped horchata and realized how imperfect I am, how life is so short, how nothing is permanent, I had to laugh. Even as everything in our political climate and world in general seems to be going to shit, I can't help but feel okay. It was a beautiful day, and even the bad things looked good from a certain perspective.
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