A big thank you

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I just turned 30. All the existential dread is gone right now. I have some regrets, I have some victories, there are some unknowns. As the Unitarians said last week, "We recognize that the uncertainty in this world is as frustrating as it is sublime". 

We think ourselves so high above the animals, but it took us millennia to invent AC. We think we're so smart, but most of us forget what's most important most of the time. Once we give up on this wild goose chase towards this illusory perfection, we can rest. This rest isn't always comfortable, but acceptance brings peace even in hardship. 

I want to give a special thank you to my friends and family. I know I'm not always easy to be a friend to. I am often self-loathing, indecisive, and sometimes judgmental. Thank you for loving me anyway. I hope I offer the same love I would like to receive, but I'm sure I fall short of this benchmark too sometimes. I'm working on it, loves. 

I had a niiightmare. Mmmmm. Now that I'm not scaaared. I love these lyrics and tune lately. Be peace. Be love. Be. 

Some things I've learned this last year that I'm thankful for:

Life can be simple if we give up on complicating it. 

There are likely no absolute answers to any questions. Just opinions. So no need to defend any stance too much. 

We need friends. We can be self-reliant up to a point, but we humans are made for community too. 

Feeling motivated comes and goes, but sometimes action can lead to motivation. So act when you feel like doing nothing, and you might start to feel like acting. 

Stargaze. Cloud watch. Sit in itchy grass. Do yoga. Take walks. Stroll. Take time to breathe and do nada. 

Cook. Clean. Do these boring essential tasks for the feeling of peace that comes after. 

Eat what you love and what makes you feel good and energized. 

True confidence is in not needing to compare oneself to others. 

Live for yourself and no one else. No one will remember you after you're gone, so no need to live to please others. 

Take time away from the routine once in a while to go camping by yourself or with friends.

Some areas where I want to grow in the year to come:

Building stronger friendships rooted in honesty and having each other's backs.

Staying grounded more consistently.

Maintaining a healthier dating life. 

Discovering and working towards the career of my dreams without giving in to despair. 

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